Well, shoot, guys. It's Thanksgiving Day.
And you know what that means, right?
Food. Foooooooood. Being thankful for everything.
Did I mention the food?
You know... It also means we're close to December.
I am not mentally prepared for that. But hey, NOW all you Christmas fanatics can crank up your Christmas tunes and I can't complain 'cause yo, 'tis the season, eh?
Anyways. Since it's Thanksgiving, I'll talk a bit about what I'm thankful for. If you wanna tell me what you're thankful for then you can comment below. :)
I'm thankful for people. Friends. Family. People who've stuck by me through thick and thin. My home. My ridiculously messy room (hey, if I have a room that can be a mess, it means that I'm blessed. See what I did there? ;), and my ridiculously beautiful guitar (okay. More like guitars. And the piano. And every other instrument we have in the house. Life of a musical family: airs every day all day at my house). I'm thankful for music, for dreams, for hope, for the ability to keep pressing on when the going gets tough, for God who put into me something amazing.
I'm not tooting my own horn when I say that. I mean that, if it had not been for the Lord, I would not be here. He gave me hope and strength to keep going, a stubbornness that will not let me give up, and, trust me, when I break down and nobody else is there to pick up the pieces, He is right there, and He does put me back together.
I'm also thankful for you, the person reading this. Honestly, if this blog wasn't being read, I'd probably still write anyways, just to get my voice out into the huge cyber world. But since it is being read, even a little bit, I'm glad that you take time to read about my rants and dreams and random stuff that finds its way out through my fingertips and into the cyber world. Communication is how two beings can connect with each other, and even though I may not have met you in person and may never meet you in person, we still connected in a little way.
You're precious. Don't ever forget that.
I hope you guys have a very happy Thanksgiving. :)
Love ya!
--Sonya :) <3
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Friday, November 6, 2015
How is it November Already...?
So, guys. It is November. In fact, the first week of November is almost over.
How did this happen?
Like, seriously. Just last week I was sick, had this hoooorrrriiibbllleeee sinus infection thing, and tryna celebrate New Years Eve in 2014. Just yesterday I was in Oklahoma City, trying not to die from heat and having the best time of my life with my youth group at NAYC'15.
And now... Um... Now it's November 2015.
Like, WHAT. HAPPENED. TO. THE. YEAR?!
Well, I don't know for you, but obviously this year flew by for me. I have been busy. Like, really busy. Like, you wouldn't think I was super busy, but I was. And this Fall term has seriously been busy. I mean, I started out doing 7 hours of study every day, and I do roughly that much now, but the amount of information I have to take in is crazy, not to mention all of the papers I have to write. Haha. And then there's also church stuff, guitar lessons for 3 hours every Saturday, and then my youngest brother looking up at me with his big brown eyes and too-cute baby face to ask, "Wanna play Halo? System link?? Puuuhhhllleeeaaaassseeeee?!?!?!?!"
That is a face that is close to impossible to say no to, and it hurts even the hardest of hearts to say no and see the sad look of disappointment that casts a cloud over his entire world.
Okay, I'm exaggerating a little. But not much! Besides, do you have any idea how much shooting aliens and blowing stuff up can let off steam? Yes, you do.
Anyways. Boys and girls, learn how to study before you get into college, it'll save you a lot of time and a lot of tears will not be shed. Also, learn how to write a good essay and use MLA citations, that'll also save you lots of tears and late nights. :)
Well, I gotta go. God bless you guys! Love ya!
'Jana!
--Sonya :)
How did this happen?
Like, seriously. Just last week I was sick, had this hoooorrrriiibbllleeee sinus infection thing, and tryna celebrate New Years Eve in 2014. Just yesterday I was in Oklahoma City, trying not to die from heat and having the best time of my life with my youth group at NAYC'15.
And now... Um... Now it's November 2015.
Like, WHAT. HAPPENED. TO. THE. YEAR?!
Well, I don't know for you, but obviously this year flew by for me. I have been busy. Like, really busy. Like, you wouldn't think I was super busy, but I was. And this Fall term has seriously been busy. I mean, I started out doing 7 hours of study every day, and I do roughly that much now, but the amount of information I have to take in is crazy, not to mention all of the papers I have to write. Haha. And then there's also church stuff, guitar lessons for 3 hours every Saturday, and then my youngest brother looking up at me with his big brown eyes and too-cute baby face to ask, "Wanna play Halo? System link?? Puuuhhhllleeeaaaassseeeee?!?!?!?!"
That is a face that is close to impossible to say no to, and it hurts even the hardest of hearts to say no and see the sad look of disappointment that casts a cloud over his entire world.
Okay, I'm exaggerating a little. But not much! Besides, do you have any idea how much shooting aliens and blowing stuff up can let off steam? Yes, you do.
Anyways. Boys and girls, learn how to study before you get into college, it'll save you a lot of time and a lot of tears will not be shed. Also, learn how to write a good essay and use MLA citations, that'll also save you lots of tears and late nights. :)
Well, I gotta go. God bless you guys! Love ya!
'Jana!
--Sonya :)
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
It's is FAAAALLLLL GUUYYYSSSS!!!! \(^_^)/
Pumpkin spice lattes are out, the leaves are finally starting to turn yellow and orange, it isn't so hot outside anymore, and people are finally starting to cover up.
Hallelujah, shando to the last part, man.
Anyways, fall is one of my favorite times of year. Because everything's dying.
Let me explain this a little bit so you don't think I'm a freaky weirdo.
Technically, nothing is dying. Not really. I mean, I guess you could say that everything is dying, things are turning brown and stuff, and life doesn't last forever. But what I mean is, everything's getting ready for the next round of life. It's like a time of closure. Summer was crazy, and things keep getting crazier, but autumn, when you just sit back for a second, look up at the sky and breathe in the smell of moist earth, hear the sound of crunchy leaves under your feet, it's like...
Ahh. You know?
Sometimes in life, we go through an autumn. Green things that were once yielding fruit are starting to turn brown and die. Stuff is getting picked off. Things are getting harvested and stored away for the cold times.
Sometimes, you feel like a tree that's dying.
Here's some good news for you: You're not dying. You're going into hibernation. It'll get cold, your tree might not look so pretty anymore, and you won't be producing any fruit, but it's so you can store up enough nutrients for the next growing season.
You might not be where you think you need to be. But hey, the sapling needs time to grow and mature before it can bare fruit. The mature, fruit-bearing trees (which includes fruit and nut trees, guys, not just the apple and orange and peach trees) need a break too. You'll get there eventually. Allow yourself to take a break from constantly producing for other people's benefit. A tree's purpose isn't solely to produce fruit for others, it's also to keep itself healthy and growing.
Happy 1st Day of Autumn, guys. :) God bless!!
Love you guys. :) <3
--Sonya :D
Hallelujah, shando to the last part, man.
Anyways, fall is one of my favorite times of year. Because everything's dying.
Let me explain this a little bit so you don't think I'm a freaky weirdo.
Technically, nothing is dying. Not really. I mean, I guess you could say that everything is dying, things are turning brown and stuff, and life doesn't last forever. But what I mean is, everything's getting ready for the next round of life. It's like a time of closure. Summer was crazy, and things keep getting crazier, but autumn, when you just sit back for a second, look up at the sky and breathe in the smell of moist earth, hear the sound of crunchy leaves under your feet, it's like...
Ahh. You know?
Sometimes in life, we go through an autumn. Green things that were once yielding fruit are starting to turn brown and die. Stuff is getting picked off. Things are getting harvested and stored away for the cold times.
Sometimes, you feel like a tree that's dying.
Here's some good news for you: You're not dying. You're going into hibernation. It'll get cold, your tree might not look so pretty anymore, and you won't be producing any fruit, but it's so you can store up enough nutrients for the next growing season.
You might not be where you think you need to be. But hey, the sapling needs time to grow and mature before it can bare fruit. The mature, fruit-bearing trees (which includes fruit and nut trees, guys, not just the apple and orange and peach trees) need a break too. You'll get there eventually. Allow yourself to take a break from constantly producing for other people's benefit. A tree's purpose isn't solely to produce fruit for others, it's also to keep itself healthy and growing.
Happy 1st Day of Autumn, guys. :) God bless!!
Love you guys. :) <3
--Sonya :D
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Music :)
Been thinking back recently on how I got into certain bands, and how their music's influenced my life and helped me get through different dark times. Sometimes, their music helped pick me back up and get me going again, other times they simply told me that I wasn't alone in what I was feeling.
Honestly, it could've been the difference between life and death if I hadn't listened to some songs.
If it hadn't been for a few people who'd showed me some different bands (like Skillet, Jars of Clay, Thousand Foot Krutch, Twenty One Pilots, Owl City, etc.) I doubt I'd be who and where I am today.
Music is a kind of haven. It's where you can simply stop thinking and let the words flow over you, the sounds that've been together can get inside of you and help sort through the mess that you're feeling. It's a place we all retreat to in order to feel something that simple words can't make us feel.
Why do you think the love song/breakup song industry's so big? 'Cause trust me, if any of us just said half of what was said in some of those love songs, people'd either look at us like we're crazy, or we'd end up in jail. Okay maybe not quite so extreme, but you get the point, right?
I mainly listen to Christian music, and there, mainly Christian Rock music, sometimes rap, sometimes electric pop, etc. I listen to some bands who don't outright SAY their Christian but if you listen to their music you can hear the strong Christian overtones and underlying themes beneath their lyrics.
Just to insert, if you don't listen to Christian music or if you listen to both Christian and secular music, I'm not judging you, I promise, I'm just stating my personal music tastes haha.
Music is a powerful thing. It can make you feel good or bad, up or down, determined or broken, angry or happy, sad or confused, etc.
Warning: this part may sound judgmental.
That's why we hear people say how important it is to be careful of what and who you listen to. Music is a way in which you can worship. So, depending on what you're listening to, if you let that theme take up a huge part of your life where you're almost (or not even almost, completely) obsessed with it, then I think it's safe to say that you're worshiping it.
God uses all kinds of things to speak to us. I mean, seriously, I've gotten hit between the eyes with how much God loves us by listening to 1D and EXO for crying out loud. But, while a Taylor Swift song can help you through a bad breakup or a 1D song can help you gain confidence and realize that you're beautiful the way you are, if you turn those people into some of the centermost pillars holding up your life, that can and will turn into something unhealthy, lead you down a path that's not what God intended for your life, and those people or subjects and stuff can turn into gods that will break you down and hurt you instead of heal you. We're supposed to worship the Creator, not the creation. :)
Anyways, sorry, didn't mean to get all theological on you guys haha. I guess I'm just tryna say that music has helped me through a lot, and it's helped you through a lot, we just need to make sure that it hasn't turned into our god instead of allowing us to get closer to the One True God. Trust me, Jesus loves music, and He likes to speak to us through it, but don't become obsessed with the owner of the mouth He chooses to speak to us through.
Love you guys!!! God bless!!! And thanks to the people who introduced me to all the different kinds of music and bands. You guys rawk. ;)
And lastly... HAPPY SUMMER!!!!!!!
--Sonya :)
Honestly, it could've been the difference between life and death if I hadn't listened to some songs.
If it hadn't been for a few people who'd showed me some different bands (like Skillet, Jars of Clay, Thousand Foot Krutch, Twenty One Pilots, Owl City, etc.) I doubt I'd be who and where I am today.
Music is a kind of haven. It's where you can simply stop thinking and let the words flow over you, the sounds that've been together can get inside of you and help sort through the mess that you're feeling. It's a place we all retreat to in order to feel something that simple words can't make us feel.
Why do you think the love song/breakup song industry's so big? 'Cause trust me, if any of us just said half of what was said in some of those love songs, people'd either look at us like we're crazy, or we'd end up in jail. Okay maybe not quite so extreme, but you get the point, right?
I mainly listen to Christian music, and there, mainly Christian Rock music, sometimes rap, sometimes electric pop, etc. I listen to some bands who don't outright SAY their Christian but if you listen to their music you can hear the strong Christian overtones and underlying themes beneath their lyrics.
Just to insert, if you don't listen to Christian music or if you listen to both Christian and secular music, I'm not judging you, I promise, I'm just stating my personal music tastes haha.
Music is a powerful thing. It can make you feel good or bad, up or down, determined or broken, angry or happy, sad or confused, etc.
Warning: this part may sound judgmental.
That's why we hear people say how important it is to be careful of what and who you listen to. Music is a way in which you can worship. So, depending on what you're listening to, if you let that theme take up a huge part of your life where you're almost (or not even almost, completely) obsessed with it, then I think it's safe to say that you're worshiping it.
God uses all kinds of things to speak to us. I mean, seriously, I've gotten hit between the eyes with how much God loves us by listening to 1D and EXO for crying out loud. But, while a Taylor Swift song can help you through a bad breakup or a 1D song can help you gain confidence and realize that you're beautiful the way you are, if you turn those people into some of the centermost pillars holding up your life, that can and will turn into something unhealthy, lead you down a path that's not what God intended for your life, and those people or subjects and stuff can turn into gods that will break you down and hurt you instead of heal you. We're supposed to worship the Creator, not the creation. :)
Anyways, sorry, didn't mean to get all theological on you guys haha. I guess I'm just tryna say that music has helped me through a lot, and it's helped you through a lot, we just need to make sure that it hasn't turned into our god instead of allowing us to get closer to the One True God. Trust me, Jesus loves music, and He likes to speak to us through it, but don't become obsessed with the owner of the mouth He chooses to speak to us through.
Love you guys!!! God bless!!! And thanks to the people who introduced me to all the different kinds of music and bands. You guys rawk. ;)
And lastly... HAPPY SUMMER!!!!!!!
--Sonya :)
Thursday, June 4, 2015
We'll Call This Post a Life Update Haha :)
Okay. My brothers and sisters are all done with school for the summer.
I finished my Statistics course.
You shoulda seen me, I freaked out, was like, YEEEESSSSSS, wrote my coach an email, barged into my parents' room (it was 11:50pm and I'd JUST hit the 70% mark for this ALEKS course) and told them, and basically had a mini party for myself by... um, going to sleep happy instead of feeling as overly-stressed as I usually do haha.
Now, on to bigger battles. Learning all 550 verses for State Finals this weekend. Ahem, I mean tomorrow. O.O
Oh, and getting my license before we leave for Florida.
And getting my Western Civ 1 course done before we leave for Florida.
Pray for me haha.
It's actually not so bad, it's just making sure I do it, that I make myself study for this stuff is the trick. I am notorious for procrastinating, and you can't do that with Bible Quizzing. Western Civ 1 CLEP test, maybe, but not effectively haha.
License, however, I probably could just cram for it some night. Bad idea, but ya know, sometimes, what can ya do haha.
Bible Quizzing State Finals... Tomorrow...
Externally, I probably seem a bit irritable. Internally, I'm a mess of unmotivated stress. (-_-)
Oh well. We will get through this weekend, and at the end of the day, it's getting the Word in your heart and actually understanding it, not how many trophies you win. :)
God bless!!!!
--Sonya :)
I finished my Statistics course.
You shoulda seen me, I freaked out, was like, YEEEESSSSSS, wrote my coach an email, barged into my parents' room (it was 11:50pm and I'd JUST hit the 70% mark for this ALEKS course) and told them, and basically had a mini party for myself by... um, going to sleep happy instead of feeling as overly-stressed as I usually do haha.
Now, on to bigger battles. Learning all 550 verses for State Finals this weekend. Ahem, I mean tomorrow. O.O
Oh, and getting my license before we leave for Florida.
And getting my Western Civ 1 course done before we leave for Florida.
Pray for me haha.
It's actually not so bad, it's just making sure I do it, that I make myself study for this stuff is the trick. I am notorious for procrastinating, and you can't do that with Bible Quizzing. Western Civ 1 CLEP test, maybe, but not effectively haha.
License, however, I probably could just cram for it some night. Bad idea, but ya know, sometimes, what can ya do haha.
Bible Quizzing State Finals... Tomorrow...
Externally, I probably seem a bit irritable. Internally, I'm a mess of unmotivated stress. (-_-)
Oh well. We will get through this weekend, and at the end of the day, it's getting the Word in your heart and actually understanding it, not how many trophies you win. :)
God bless!!!!
--Sonya :)
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
So Close...
Guys. Summer is so close, like, gaahh.
And so is State Finals.
And I'm studying for my driver's license. So close to getting it haha.
And I'm 1% away from being done with my Intro to Statistics course.
And I'm so close to exploding. (-_-) Anyways.
Just a random update on how things have been going. My old college coach had to retire from being my coach because she has some health problems and needs a lot of time to rest and get better, so I got transferred to a new coach. I'm gonna miss my old coach, but my new coach is pretty awesome too so is all good. :D
Also, as you can tell, I've been tearing my hair out over Statistics. SO CLOOOSEEE but I just spent like, three hours doing it. So I'm taking a short break.
Oh, we did a choir concert, and we never have to sing Happy again. EVER. Cool song, don't get me wrong, but when you have to sing "Happyyyy-ee-ee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeeee-eee-eee-eeeeeee" a few million times, while clapping out a VERY specific beat, and then getting taught a new beat the week before the concert and you only have two more practices before you have to perform, you just... you never really get over it... and it just... well, you get the picture. We're sooo done with that song haha.
And camps and Youth Congress and (hopefully, if we make it) Nationals are in the next few months too, woohoo!!!
And I plan on getting 3 courses done this summer. Yes, I once again am going to work through the summer. What is this 'break' you speak of? I've never heard of it!
Jk, but only 'cause my mom's forcing me for some of it. Ya know. :)
Also, I've been going on some anime-watching sprees. And freaking out most of it, 'cause my sister spoiled half of it 'cause she read the mangas, and my friends spoiled the other half 'cause they're all caught up, and I'm fiiiinally watching most of it happen haha.
What're your summer plans? Beach, go visit friends/family, work through it like me, get a job, or just go on Netflix binges? Whatever it is, have a bunch of fun. If you aren't planning on doing anything that you would consider 'fun', well, dude make the most of it anyway!
But don't get in trouble. Please, please don't get in trouble.
Okay, I'mma go back to studying now.
Love you guys!!! God bless!!!
--Sonya :)
P.S. sorry I'm so random today. After three hours of math, I get REALLY random. Anyways. Continue on your day, have a good one, love ya!!! :P :)
And so is State Finals.
And I'm studying for my driver's license. So close to getting it haha.
And I'm 1% away from being done with my Intro to Statistics course.
And I'm so close to exploding. (-_-) Anyways.
Just a random update on how things have been going. My old college coach had to retire from being my coach because she has some health problems and needs a lot of time to rest and get better, so I got transferred to a new coach. I'm gonna miss my old coach, but my new coach is pretty awesome too so is all good. :D
Also, as you can tell, I've been tearing my hair out over Statistics. SO CLOOOSEEE but I just spent like, three hours doing it. So I'm taking a short break.
Oh, we did a choir concert, and we never have to sing Happy again. EVER. Cool song, don't get me wrong, but when you have to sing "Happyyyy-ee-ee-eeeee-eee-eee-eeeeee-eee-eee-eeeeeee" a few million times, while clapping out a VERY specific beat, and then getting taught a new beat the week before the concert and you only have two more practices before you have to perform, you just... you never really get over it... and it just... well, you get the picture. We're sooo done with that song haha.
And camps and Youth Congress and (hopefully, if we make it) Nationals are in the next few months too, woohoo!!!
And I plan on getting 3 courses done this summer. Yes, I once again am going to work through the summer. What is this 'break' you speak of? I've never heard of it!
Jk, but only 'cause my mom's forcing me for some of it. Ya know. :)
Also, I've been going on some anime-watching sprees. And freaking out most of it, 'cause my sister spoiled half of it 'cause she read the mangas, and my friends spoiled the other half 'cause they're all caught up, and I'm fiiiinally watching most of it happen haha.
What're your summer plans? Beach, go visit friends/family, work through it like me, get a job, or just go on Netflix binges? Whatever it is, have a bunch of fun. If you aren't planning on doing anything that you would consider 'fun', well, dude make the most of it anyway!
But don't get in trouble. Please, please don't get in trouble.
Okay, I'mma go back to studying now.
Love you guys!!! God bless!!!
--Sonya :)
P.S. sorry I'm so random today. After three hours of math, I get REALLY random. Anyways. Continue on your day, have a good one, love ya!!! :P :)
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
So, I watched "To Save a Life" today O.O
Okay. So me and my sister just watched the movie To Save a Life. And we managed not to cry. Although I'm pretty sure we brushed away tears throughout the movie. And my sister is NOT a very emotional person, and it had HER in tears. Because, well...
When you really think about it, when you're walking down the halls at school, or walking down the sidewalk, and you pass someone, do you really see them? Like, really see them? Sure, they take up some space on the sidewalk or in the hall, but you don't really think about it if you don't know them. They're just that person you pass sometimes.
You have no idea what people are going through until you take the time to try to find out who they are. Sometimes, a person feels like they're simply a waste of space, screaming so loud but their screams get swallowed up by the silence that is their reality. Things in their lives are so real to them, but to the people around them it's not important, it's not worth crying over, it's not worth stressing over, it's just not worth it.
And then, they hear something whisper to them, and it fills them with so much fear and hopelessness, they feel like they're drowning:
Maybe, you're not important. Maybe, the reason it's not worth it, is because you're not worth it.
So they go throughout their days, fighting that little voice, that voice that keeps whispering over and over and over again to them:
You're a waste of space. You're not worth the time. You are worthless. You are nothing. You are an unimportant being living an unimportant life doing unimportant things that amount to absolutely nothing.
You should do the world a favor and just end yourself.
And when someone yells at them for not doing better, or if someone scolds them for an accident, it just reinforces that lie.
I'm not saying you shouldn't try your best. I'm not saying that having someone tell you not to let an accident happen again isn't a good thing. But I do want to tackle that voice who's telling you, See? Even they think you're stupid. Even they think you should be better than this, but you can't do better. That's all you've got. Even they can see that you're just a waste of space, of air, they'd be happy if you'd stop giving them so many problems.
That is a lie.
That is a huge, stinking, horrible lie straight from the mouth of Satan.
If you weren't worth the effort, do you think God would've come Himself to earth? He robed Himself in the same flesh that you and I are in, and lived a life to die for you. He lived perfectly so He could ultimately die, so that you could live.
Put that knife down, love. He was already cut for you. He bled so that you wouldn't have to. He died so you wouldn't have to. He paid the price so that you wouldn't have to.
Stop believing that lie. You are worth more to Jesus than anything in the universe. He loves you so much. He wants you to stretch out your hand to Him and let Him save you.
I know there are hypocrites in the church, I know that people judge, I know that the lie still comes back and the pain is almost too much for you to bear so you cry yourself to sleep at times, I know that it's hard.
But you don't have to face it alone. Go where you know God is. Go where you know you can find Him. Get ahold of God, and don't let go no matter what because He's the only solid ground in this world that is all quicksand. This world keeps sucking you down and suffocating you 'til you finally succumb to death.
God is the God who created life. He is love. He cares when nobody else does, and He is always there for you, even when you don't feel Him.
He'll send someone if that's what you need. He'll do whatever it takes to bring you to Him. He loves you.
I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to.
God bless. Have a good rest of your week.
--Sonya :)
P.S. You alone cannot fight that voice. You alone will not make it. But you and God? That's a completely different story. You and God can make it through anything. Just try Him, and don't let go. :) Love ya.
When you really think about it, when you're walking down the halls at school, or walking down the sidewalk, and you pass someone, do you really see them? Like, really see them? Sure, they take up some space on the sidewalk or in the hall, but you don't really think about it if you don't know them. They're just that person you pass sometimes.
You have no idea what people are going through until you take the time to try to find out who they are. Sometimes, a person feels like they're simply a waste of space, screaming so loud but their screams get swallowed up by the silence that is their reality. Things in their lives are so real to them, but to the people around them it's not important, it's not worth crying over, it's not worth stressing over, it's just not worth it.
And then, they hear something whisper to them, and it fills them with so much fear and hopelessness, they feel like they're drowning:
Maybe, you're not important. Maybe, the reason it's not worth it, is because you're not worth it.
So they go throughout their days, fighting that little voice, that voice that keeps whispering over and over and over again to them:
You're a waste of space. You're not worth the time. You are worthless. You are nothing. You are an unimportant being living an unimportant life doing unimportant things that amount to absolutely nothing.
You should do the world a favor and just end yourself.
And when someone yells at them for not doing better, or if someone scolds them for an accident, it just reinforces that lie.
I'm not saying you shouldn't try your best. I'm not saying that having someone tell you not to let an accident happen again isn't a good thing. But I do want to tackle that voice who's telling you, See? Even they think you're stupid. Even they think you should be better than this, but you can't do better. That's all you've got. Even they can see that you're just a waste of space, of air, they'd be happy if you'd stop giving them so many problems.
That is a lie.
That is a huge, stinking, horrible lie straight from the mouth of Satan.
If you weren't worth the effort, do you think God would've come Himself to earth? He robed Himself in the same flesh that you and I are in, and lived a life to die for you. He lived perfectly so He could ultimately die, so that you could live.
Put that knife down, love. He was already cut for you. He bled so that you wouldn't have to. He died so you wouldn't have to. He paid the price so that you wouldn't have to.
Stop believing that lie. You are worth more to Jesus than anything in the universe. He loves you so much. He wants you to stretch out your hand to Him and let Him save you.
I know there are hypocrites in the church, I know that people judge, I know that the lie still comes back and the pain is almost too much for you to bear so you cry yourself to sleep at times, I know that it's hard.
But you don't have to face it alone. Go where you know God is. Go where you know you can find Him. Get ahold of God, and don't let go no matter what because He's the only solid ground in this world that is all quicksand. This world keeps sucking you down and suffocating you 'til you finally succumb to death.
God is the God who created life. He is love. He cares when nobody else does, and He is always there for you, even when you don't feel Him.
He'll send someone if that's what you need. He'll do whatever it takes to bring you to Him. He loves you.
I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to.
God bless. Have a good rest of your week.
--Sonya :)
P.S. You alone cannot fight that voice. You alone will not make it. But you and God? That's a completely different story. You and God can make it through anything. Just try Him, and don't let go. :) Love ya.
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