Random Thoughts Post :)

Sooo today my brothers and sisters and I have established two fantastic things:

#1. My sister looks really pretty when she smiles and laughs.

#2. I look like a witch when I laugh. (o.0)

Like I said. Fantastic.

Actually, it's hilarious, I grabbed a hat and she grabbed a broom and my brother (who has this really weird kinda gasping/cackling laugh) said, "I'll be your laugh!" and we then proceeded to laugh our heads off while I tried to ride the broom around and Frank did his laugh on command.

It's okay. I know. Say it. "You guys are weeeeiirrrddd." I completely agree.

School's going well. For once I'm not like, stressed out about school necessarily. I mean, not like I was last year, last year was a nightmare tryna get those 6 stinking credits for Intro to Philosophy and English Comp 2.

Thank God that's over, like gaaahhh haha.

Oh yeah. We're on Day 3 of our Daniel Fast+Media Fast. I don't count this blog as media because it's like a diary entry that the entire world can see, and I don't usually read my blog religiously like I would check my Facebook (yeah, Facebook is being fasted from, and it's already alerted me that I have 10 notifications, 3 group updates, and 21 new messages. WHO IS MESSAGING ME?!?! is kinda on my mind right now, like, whoa guys I'm sorry I shoulda left a note on my status that I wasn't gonna be on it for three weeks, oops). I'm definitely missing meat right now, and trying to figure out what's actually 'sugar' and what isn't (seriously, like, are we counting high fructose corn syrup and sucralose and all that junk that's way worse than sugar? Not gonna freak out if we are or aren't, I just wanna make sure I'm conforming to what the rest of the church is doing so we'll be all nice and unified together) is a bit annoying haha. I'm kind of wondering how many people have already lost like, 5 lbs from just cutting out sugar too. Seriously, if you wanna lose weight, cut sugar outta your diet. My pastor put it this way once, talking about a guy he met who'd lost like, 300 lbs or so in 3 years: "Everybody else was saying yes, but I said no." Profound, right? Just say no to sugar and stick to it. Trust me, if my pastor's nine-year-old daughter can say no to sugar for 3 weeks, you can too.

So yeah. If you got my number and need me, text me. If you don't, I will reply to comments.

My pastor told me something else kind of profound the other day. The situation I'm in will change because I will change. I'll grow up, I'll figure this stuff out, and the situation will change because I've changed. The people in the situations I face may not change, but the situation, on my side at least, will change because I will choose to change. I choose to change myself, use self-control to keep from punching people (yes, I am a Christian, and yes, I've wanted to punch people before because I'm also human and we've all found other humans to be extraordinarily aggravating at one time or another to the point where punching them, while it may not help the problem, would still be quite satisfying), I'm still learning how to forgive and not hold stuff against others, and at the end of the day, it's me and my own behavior and relationship with God that I can work on. If other people change their behavior too, then that's great. I don't need to worry about it. Worrying'll just give me a headache, a stomachache, and unnecessary heartache too.

That was a really long way of saying, I can change, you can change, and the thing you wanna change will change if you choose to change.

You guys are great. Hope this year brings new change, new life, and new hope. Our lives are all stories. In the word of the Doctor, "Make it a good one, eh?" :)

God bless!! Have a great rest of your week!! Love ya!!

--Sonya :) <3

First Post of 2016... And Life's Still a Mess!!!!

It's 2016. People are trying to be like, "New year, new me," like they do every year, but honestly, they don't. It's a new year, but people are still the same old selves they were back in 2015, you know what I mean?

Sorry, just a pet peeve of mine. Like, you say you're gonna do this, so why don't you actually do it? Leave behind all that junk in 2015.

I know it's harder than that. But you'd think they'd at least try for like, a month.

I am still a mess. I have a Bible Quizzing Tournament in a week and a half, I have to study for a big UExcel exam (which is like a glorified CLEP, more in depth, etc.), I have a new Statistics course (and we all know how well the last one went, check earlier posts), and I failed the road test for my driver's license. Um, my mom thinks I can become an amazing driver in a week and wants to take me back to the DMV next week. I'll let you know how badly that turns out. Oh yeah, and this Friday I'm playing keyboard for our youth group. I have recently begun to realize how amateur of a musician I really am, and believe me, it ain't pretty. So I have to practice for that.

Lotsa pressure from lotsa different places. AT LEAST my dad didn't rip into me for failing the road test. Growing up with a Chinese dad, you kind of expect to get ripped into if you don't pass a test the best anyone possibly can. Nope, not just a stereotype. Lots of parents (not just Chinese) have high expectations of their kids, soooo I'm hoping at least one of you are feeling me here.

Ever get that feeling that you're being crushed by a boulder, very slowly? Like, at first it hurts so bad, then after a while you get used to it, and then suddenly there's more pressure and you feel like you're going to break apart into millions of tiny pieces 'cause you can't handle it. Then you get used to that too. But just when you get used to it, more pressure hits you. Or maybe you get a small break, a little bit of relief from the pressure for a little while. But when you come back to it, the pressure's there, and worse now. You feel like it shouldn't be, it's the same pressure you've always had, but it's still heavy, it still hurts, and you're still scared to death it'll crush you and you'll be that person. You know that one, the one who has no direction, failed when they tried and could never regain their footing, the one who "never amounted to anything even though they had so much potential."

Well... enough with the pity party, babe. I come against that fear, that lie, in the name of Jesus. You and me are gonna get through this, the situations we're going through are temporary, and I promise you that we will prove those lies wrong and achieve those dreams God put deep inside of our hearts. We just gotta keep going, keep pushing through, never give up, and have faith in God that He'll bring us through this path He set our feet on.

Love you guys. Keep your chins up. God bless.

--Sonya <3