Fire. Coal. Diamonds. Info Dump. Teehee.

This is gonna be my inspiration for tomorrow night, and I need to get the fifty billion thoughts in my head about it out in, well, words, so bear with me guys. 😅

People have been talking a lot about fire recently. They've also been talking about a process, transformation, that kind of thing.

So here's this thing that goes through the fire, goes through a process, and undergoes this crazy transformation. You can make a diamond out of a piece of coal because they're both carbon compounds. The difference between a diamond and coal is that, while they're both carbon compounds, they're organized completely differently. A piece of coal gets put into a highly pressurized, incredibly heated environment. After a while in that heat, under all that pressure, it gets taken out and suddenly, it's no longer coal but a diamond. It still has to go through some cutting and polishing and stuff, so the process ain't over yet, but when it's done, it's this beautiful, valuable thing. And get this: when you shine a light through a diamond, you see different aspects of the light. A piece of coal gets a light shined on it and it's just a piece of coal. A diamond reflects and refracts light so you get that awesome rainbow effect that shows you all the different colors of the light spectrum.

We are like pieces of coal separated from the rest of the coal and set aside for the Master's use. When we pray, "Oh God, give me strength, give me patience," we think God's just gonna magically download patience and strength into us. It don't work like that, friend. See, we pray and ask Him for all of these awesome things, and then freak out wondering what we did wrong 'cause suddenly everything's blowing up in our face, our patience is wearing thin, there's all of this pressure coming against us and we are not strong enough to handle everything that's coming against us. But really, we're getting exactly what we asked for. It's a trial by fire. We're getting pressure from all around because God's trying to restructure us into what He wants us to be. We're going through the fire because it'll burn away all of the mess and stuff in us that isn't right. The bible talks about God being an "all-consuming fire" (Hebrews 12:29) and that literally means He consumes every single last thing. Are you gonna let God consume every part of your life? He isn't doing this to destroy you, He's doing it to strengthen you and build up your patience. It's a muscle you gotta build. It's a process you gotta go through. So instead of freaking out like, "Why's everyone against me?" "Why is this happening to me?" "Why *insert whatever*?" ask, "What is God trying to work out in me and what can I learn from this?" And then do it. Allow the Spirit of God to flow through you in those situations. James 1:4 says, "Let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." Go through that intense heat and pressurizing process that restructures you and makes you into something new and something beautiful that can reflect the light of Jesus to everyone around you.

So that's basically it. If you got any suggestions, I welcome criticism. 😁 Aaaand keep in mind, this has to be about 5 minutes or so. Yes, I can talk really fast but I can't just give people an info dump and expect them to retain everything. 😅

Speaking of which, I'm sorry I haven't posted anything in a SUPER long time. Life's been crazy. I finished my coursework for my BA, I've been trying to make sure I have all my ducks in a line so that I can graduate in December, and then I've been freaking out about that and trying to get accepted into graduate school so I can go in January. So, basically, I'm preaching to myself as much as I'm preaching to my youth group tomorrow night, haha. Humans are great, it's the time crunches that're killing me. It's all in God's hands, though.

To all of you college and high school etc. folk, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You will get your BA done, college people! I believe in you. High schoolers, you will get your high school diploma! All y'all gonna change the world. See? I believe in you so much that this Minnesotan even said 'All y'all' for extra emphasis. You can do it. You're awesome. I love you. You guys inspire me. 😊

God bless you guys!

--Sonya :) <3

Update on Life :)

So, I learned something preetttyyy crazy this week. You ready for it?

Sleep is a precious commodity when you've forgotten that you had an assignment due last week and that you have an assignment due the next day that there's no way in Heaven you'll be able to get it done because you set yourself the task of reading Return of the King, among other books, in only two weeks. Because let's change the world one story at a time, right?

Pro tip #1: Get some sleep after a crazy thing like North American Youth Congress. And I mean sleep, guys.

Pro tip #2: Try not to get sick while you're at it. 😅

But anywho. I got the assignment done, turned it in late but it's done, now on to the next. I gotta make sure I don't overdo it, but I also need to make sure I stay on top of my assignments.

So let's talk about NAYC'17. It. Was. Phenomenal. 34,000+ Apostolic young people gathered together at Lucas Oil Stadium. The air was like electricity, the expectation was so high. The Holy Ghost was so thick in that stadium, the Colts might get the Holy Ghost next time they walk in there, you know?😜  Callings and prophecies were given and reconfirmed. People walked in one way and walked out another.

How do I know this? 'Cause I was one of them. I was changed. Promises God gave me, He reminded me of them again, vividly planting images into my mind of lost family members being saved, of being used by Him and doing things for His Kingdom and seeing souls saved. That first night, God didn't so much remind me of how great He is as He did reveal to me how great He is. Granted, if He'd showed me the whole nine yards I wouldn't be here to tell the tale, that's way too much for any human being to handle. But He gave me a better picture of how great He is. His greatness makes up for my weakness. He is great enough to make the things happen that are too big for me to do on my own. I'm human, I'll mess up, I'll forget, I'll lose sight of what's important, I'll stumble and I'll fall flat on my face, but He's greater than all of that, and He'll make it all work out just the way He planned.

I could go on for hours about the things God did at NAYC'17. There was testimony after testimony of people who were just working the stadium getting the Holy Ghost, getting healed, miracles happening in people's lives, all those kinds of things. People heard the call of God and ran after it. They didn't allow fear to be a factor, to motivate their actions, they let faith in God motivate them. We decided to answer the question "Is this that?" with "This IS That!" and we're drawing some lines, and we're keeping the fire burning and gonna see breakthroughs in our churches, towns, cities, nations, continents ('cause guys, we had people from other continents besides North America there, we're finna go global here!), and bruh, it's already lit. If God can do this much, how much more can He do? We ain't seen the end of it yet. In these last days, in this last hour, God's gonna completely blow our minds, we just gotta be willing to step out in faith and follow Him so that we can be a part of it.

God bless you guys. Keep that fire burning. And don't forget... THIS IS THAT!

Stay to the Side or Stand Up and Fight?

Which would you rather: Fight in a war, or watch both sides tear each other to shreds?

Let's set some parameters to this scenario: Neutrality means you live, but everyone in that war dies and neither side wins. Choosing to fight for one side means that you die, but your side wins, and everyone lives.

Let's say you choose neutrality. It's one of our basic human instincts to avoid pain and try to live. We're even called 'mentally ill' if we wish to die. You live your life, walking this line between the two sides of the war. You watch as people die around you. Men, women, children. Friends, family, acquaintances, complete strangers. The evil ones and the good ones. The atrocities that are committed, some that you could easily have averted, but that would've violated your oath of neutrality. Doing something means you've chosen a side, cast away neutrality and dared to believe you could make a difference. Doing something means you have to die.

Now, let's say you choose to fight. You know what's right. You know what you're supposed to do, what you've been called to do, or maybe you don't but there's something inside of you that says enough, enough of the senseless slaughter and the despair around you. Enough innocent blood being spilled, it's time to do something, to take up arms and fight.

And fight you do. You fight with everything you have inside of you. With every step forward, you can feel a part of you dying, being replaced by something new, by something supernatural, until one day you have to make a decision: die and win, or live and lose. Take back your neutrality, and you can live. You won't be bothered anymore. You won't have to fight anymore, because you're neutral. Because you don't care.

And you choose to die.

Neutrality is a beautiful lie. You cannot live neutrally without killing your heart and your mind, your very ability to feel and move forward. If you do not stand for something, then there's really no point in living, is there?

You have to choose a side at some point. You have to make your own decision about what you believe.Your friends can't make that decision for you. Your parents can't make that decision for you. Your pastor, youth pastor, church leaders, etc. can't make that decision for you. Nobody else can make that decision for you. You have to make it.

So, friend. Choose you this day whom you will serve. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Who will you serve?

I Have a Dream

Martin Luther King Jr. was an inspirational man. Social Justice warrior, Christian, a man with uncompromising beliefs, this guy had a dream, and he pursued it with everything he had and inspired (and I dare say he still inspires) millions. That line from his speech, "I have a dream," is probably the one most remembered, quoted line that we know.

So let me use that line for a few minutes.

I have a dream. I have a dream that one day, I will see revival in a foreign country. I have a dream to preach, teach, live out and show the Gospel of Jesus Christ to people who've never heard it before. It's not gonna be me that changes people, it's gonna be the power of God that changes 'em. I just wanna be there to see it and let Him use me as a conduit of His power.

I have a dream that my unsaved family members will come to not only know Jesus, but be changed by His transformational power, go through the salvation process of Acts 2:38, and run with what He gives them. He gave me a promise, and I'm gonna hold onto that and stand on that promise 'til the day I see it fulfilled.

I have a dream that the people who have fought so hard against God will have a divine encounter with Him just like Saul of Tarsus did, and, just like he did, become the greatest apostles we've ever seen.

I have a dream that the friends and family who've left the Truth will come back and go forward stronger than before. Just because you left church doesn't mean God left you. Just because you messed up doesn't mean God's given up on you. He still loves you, He still has a plan and a purpose and a destiny for you, and He's calling you back to Him, listen to that voice, run towards the voice of God.

I have a dream that my youth group will grow in maturity, spiritually, and in number. As long as we got those three happenin', it doesn't matter to me in which order they go, but there's gotta be a spiritual maturity if we want to grow in number. A buncha young people in a building is just a social club. We have not been called to be a social club, we've been called to change the world. We gotta be a buncha Holy Spirit transformed young people, generating an atmosphere of the power and Spirit of God everywhere we go, whether it's at school, at work, at home, and yes, at church and bible studies and youth group too.

I'm not, by any stretch of the imagination, Dr. King. He was a legend. I'm just me.

But legends are what happen when someone takes a dream, picks up a worthy cause, and do whatever it takes to make it happen.

He died for his dream. Are we willing to die for ours? Or, maybe even more important, are we willing to live to make them happen?

Update on College and Life in General :)

So, here's an update on life.

I have a job. I love this job. It's a fun job. I get to create and design and send emails, help out with Facebook ad campaigns and manage accounts, and learn more about the world of marketing.

Seriously. It's stinking fascinating, guys.

I also passed a test, which leaves me 5 courses (2 DSSTs and 3 TESU courses) closer to finishing my BA. Guys. Guuyyssss. I'm gonna be a college graduate before Christmas guys. 😁😁😁

Weeellll, I say before Christmas, what I really mean is, I'll be done with my classes by roughly September-October, and I'll apply for December graduation. So I'll get a diploma for Christmas. So I won't officially be a college graduate when my last class is over, but I will be a college graduate when my last class is over. Clear as mud, right? Teehee.

Oh yeah, and my youth group went to IYC'17 like, two weeks ago, and my wooooorrrdddd. The music was incredible, anointed, powerful, and all that and a bag of chips haha. The preaching, also incredible, anointed, powerful, it changed my life. One second, the preacher had me laughing my lungs out, the next bawling my eyes out. Our youth group grew closer together, definitely. We literally had the best time hanging out, and we didn't hate each other by the end of it. It was straight up weird not seeing everybody at breakfast and hanging out at dinner and stuff that next week.

Oh, and two of my best friends COMPLETELY surprised me by coming up from Urshan to see me and give me birthday gifts, and I even got to hang out with one of 'em at the Afterburner. The shock and love is still real haha, I'm still extra happy that they came and surprised me, and it's been two weeks. x) Bottom line: IYC'17 was lit, guys.

So anyways, I started studying for this next test, the 'Rise and Fall of the Soviet Union'. Guys. Russia is crazy. Their history is fascinating. If you get the chance to study Russia, do it, and do it with an open mind. I don't keep up too much with current events, but I know that people are having issues with Russia, and I feel like if we understood it, its history and culture and everything, then we wouldn't have half the messes in history that we have haha. But for real. Study it. If for no other reason than because they got cool names like Vladimir and Vasilii and Ivan and there's also the Teutonic Knights and the Swordbearers and the Mongols and stuff. I mean, who doesn't like Vladimir and the Teutonic Knights? It just sounds cool.

Ahem. Moving on.

So I still don't have any idea what I'm gonna name my blog since I am neither a teenager nor homeschooled. Well, I guess you could say I'm still homeschooled, but you get the idea. I'm graduating college soon. I'm not a teenager anymore. And 'A Day in the Life of a Twenty-Year-Old Almost-Graduating College Student' is a bit too much of a mouthful. Plus, I'd have to change the name again when I graduate, and then again when I turn 21. xP

Ayoo. Well whatevs. So, you guys, summer's approaching, which means most of y'all traditional school-goers will be outta school on summer break for a few months, yay!!! And the rest of us non-traditionals are... still in school. What's a summer break? What's a break? x)

This could mean you're facing a bunch of finals and projects and assignments to turn in that you're either totally caught up on or you've procrastinated too much on and now you're feeling the panic set in. Don't worry: You're going to make it. You've made it before, you'll make it again, you can do this. I believe in you.

God bless you guys. Love ya. :)

--Sonya :) <3

Teen-hood Gone, On to the Twenties!!!

It's my birthday. I am no longer a teenager. GUYS. I AM NO LONGER A TEENAGER!!!!

To be honest, it doesn't feel different until I think about it. I've lived on this earth for two decades. I've seen sunrises and sunsets, good days and bad days, rainy days and sunny days and snowy days and chilly days and extra-too hot days.

I made it. Not like, made it. But I made it to my twentieth year of life. That's more than some can say. I am blessed. I got a roof over my head, a crazy family who loves and supports me, crazier friends who make life worth living, the ability to listen to music and read and write and laugh and cry and learn and move and grow. I have coffee for goodness's sake, and hot running water, and a nice phone with a great plan (thanks, mom, thanks dad :D), and a computer, and glasses, and a guitar. I could go on all day and all night.

Something struck me while I was on my way home from work today. Through the ups and the downs, God's been there for me through it all. When I was good, and when I was a complete and total mess of hormones and rebellion and pain, He was there. When I wanted to just lie down and die (both figuratively and literally), He was there, keeping me alive, keeping the blood pumping through my veins and the oxygen coming in and carbon dioxide going out. When I wanted to hit someone over the head with a folding chair or throw someone out the window, He held me back (and in some cases, sent an angel to keep me from doing something irrational like that, thanks, sis).

When I missed my friends and felt completely lost and alone, He was there. When I was broken, He was there. God had, has a plan for me. I can't go a day without Him. He's my rock and my salvation, the One who knows the beginning to the end, the One who robed Himself in flesh and came down and died for me. He's a faithful God. I can't wait to see what else He has in store for me.

And if this God has a plan for me, then trust me, He has a plan for you too. You may not be 20 yet, or maybe you're over 20, but He definitely still has a plan for your life. How do I know this? Well, if He didn't then you wouldn't be reading this, now would you? :D

Trust Him in and through the process. Pain means you're growing and that you're still alive. Pain is a lesson. You just need to learn it. When you're in the fire, He's in it with you. When the storm's raging around you, He's right there with you. Maybe He's calling you to get out of the boat and walk on the water. Maybe He's in the boat with you and you need to have more faith and stop freaking out. He said you'd make it to the other side, and if God says it, it's gonna happen. He's faithful.

Life's such a crazy thing, a precious gift. It's made up of decisions that we make. My life's not over yet, and neither is yours. We both have a chance to make our lives mean something, and God can make it mean more than we ever thought possible. So go do something with your life. Don't give up. Keep pressing forward towards the destiny that God has for you.

God bless you guys. Love ya. <3 :)

--Sonya :) <3

P.S. Guys I need a new name for this blog 'cause I'm no longer a teenager. If no one gives me suggestions, I will be forced to come up with one myself. Muahaha. But seriously though if you have suggestions, comment, I am accepting suggestions and if I like more than one I may just do a crazy mash-up so I don't know. x)

Update on College

So. I'm coming to the home stretch.

Got three more DSSTs to finish, two more transcripts to send off, an application to fill out, a few weeks to wait (hopefully it's only a few weeks, pray, saints!), some financial aid stuff to figure out, and then three more courses and I'll be done with my BA.

Yup. That's right. After about four years of doing online college, I'm finally gonna be done with my degree.

*Deep breath* YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Ahem. Anywho.

It's been a long, kinda crazy journey. I've passed tests, gone through some struggles, been stressed out the wazoo, laughed, cried, learned, grown, fallen down, gotten back up, screamed, changed my major, prayed, face-walled (like a face-palm, but with the wall instead of a palm), sighed in relief when some courses were over, triumphed, got punched in the gut and kicked in the butt by some of the assignments, and we're not outta the woods yet, but we're getting there. 😌

You'll probably hear more rants and triumphs and happy events and crazy events in the upcoming weeks (or months, haha, sorry about that), and I hope you enjoy reading these sort of random windows into my mind and life.

It's still kinda surreal. It hits me at random times that this is happening. I'm finally accomplishing this thing that I've been working at for years. It's like I'm coming up to the final few chapters of a book, and after it's finally over and I've finally finished it, I'll start another one. Jobs, writing more books, graduate school, going overseas as a missionary, working with broken and hurting people, shining the light of Jesus into a dark world. Who knows? The possibilities are endless, 'cause God's in control. It's gonna be amazing, I know that much.

Oh, and hey. To the kid, adult, human being that has a plan, keep pursuing it, but don't get discouraged if things don't work out exactly like you planned. Sometimes, God wants us to go in a different direction than what we originally wanted, and He'll shake up our plans because our plans aren't His plans. He wants to use you for a purpose that will blow your mind, and in order to do that you gotta trust Him and follow His lead.

And to the human who had a plan but it all got messed up, or you don't even have a plan, just keep trusting God. Keep following Him. Who cares if it's not quite what you had in mind? My dad was gonna go into med school, become a doctor, ended up feeling a call to the violin. Now, he's a violin teacher, helping kids learn discipline and responsibility and watching them change their worlds. And let's talk about Joseph, in the Bible. Man, that dude went through the most insane stuff. He didn't really have a plan, but he had a promise from God, and after all these crazy things happened to him, being sold into slavery, being falsely accused and thrown into prison, being forgotten there, all that junk, he ended up being second-in-command of Egypt, and God fulfilled that promise He'd given him.

I'm not exactly sure what God's got in store for me in the future, but I know that even in the darkest places, as long as I'm in God's will, it will work out and be better than I ever could've dreamed. God's gonna take you places you never thought you could go, and you'll reach people you never thought you could reach. You just trust and follow Him. Trust me, it's gonna be epic. 😏

God bless you guys!!! Love ya!!!

--Sonya 😁💕💞💓🐧🐤🐼🐶🐵🐠🍲🍥🍜🍛☕

P.S. please forgive me buuutttt I JUST FOUND OUT I COULD INSERT EMOJIS INTO MY BLOG POSTS AND I'M KINDA HAPPY ABOUT THIS. GOD BLESS YOU AND HAVE A GOOD NIGHT. 🌙🌠🌝🌃🌄🌆🌇🌉🌌